Welcome to month nine of the “Who I Am project. This month the prompt is “Education,” and like my previous posts, I wrote this as if I were speaking to Eve (and any other children I have in the future).
I always knew I would one day go to college.
For many Jewish families, education and schooling are very important. Those values were ingrained in me from a young age, and it never once crossed my mind that I wouldn’t go to college immediately after graduating from high school.
Some might call me a big of a nerd. I love learning and am prone to taking classes very seriously. So much so that I spent the plane ride home from Nice finishing up a final paper for a course I was taking for fun.
Papa asked me why I was taking this class so seriously when the grade didn’t count for anything.
I told him, “I can’t not take a class seriously.”
This wasn’t always the case.
In elementary school, my grades didn’t always reflect my abilities. I didn’t do poorly in school, but I didn’t always “apply” myself. I always did my homework — I was a stickler for the following the rules and worried about getting in trouble, so there was no way I would dream about skipping it.
However, when it came to studying and taking tests I didn’t always work as hard.
Who would imagine that this adorable little girl wasn’t applying herself?
Finally, at some point in early middle school, after many chats with your Nana and Grandpa, it connected for me. I took learning more seriously and “applied” myself, getting into advanced and honors classes and always placing on the honor role.
My sense of pride and self-worth were very much tied to how I did in school and the grades I received. I wanted Nana and Grandpa’s approval, and I craved the positive attention I received when I came home with an A.
There is nothing wrong with wanting to do well and succeed. Unfortunately, for many years I missed the value in learning. For me, it was a means to end — doing well in school meant getting into a good college, and in many ways making my family proud. It wasn’t until later in college that I realized that there was so much more to getting a good education.
At my college graduation
Education is more than just the classes you take, the grades you get, and the schools you attend.
I realize now that education is also an experience. It’s learning about the world and understanding things from different viewpoints.
While I feel very fortunate to have had the education I did and to go to the school I attended, and I very much value what I have learned from my college and graduate school experiences, I recognize now that a significant portion of my education has nothing to do with school.
My education also includes backpacking around South America with Papa, running my own business and website, and being a parent.
(As you’ll hopefully see one day, being a parent is a constant hands-on education.)
Every day I learn something from being your mom
I am always seeking opportunities to learn, whether it be through reading a parenting book or taking an online course for my business or a creative course in the community.
Do I want you to take school seriously and work hard? Of course. Do I expect you to go to college? At this point, that is a resounding yes.
But my hope for you is that you appreciate the education you receive both inside and outside the classroom. I want to grant you opportunities to learn about the world and experience firsthand. I want you to learn because you enjoy it.
There is something so wonderful about the knowledge and skills you can learn when you soak in those opportunities and learn for the sake of learning.
(Just don’t forget to apply yourself along the way!)
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The “Who I Am” project is a year-long monthly series that my friend Dana at Kiss My Listfollow started, as a way to create a virtual scrapbook of your life to tell your kids, grandkids, spouse, friends, or whoever who you are. You can link up our posts, which goes live the third Tuesday of the month, on either of our blogs, and sign up to receive the prompts at the beginning of each month via e-mail. The themes so far have been Childhood, Love, Quirks & Habits, How you’ve changed since you were a child, Favorite Places, Betcha Didn’t Know, and Things I Love.
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What a great letter, Bev and will say I was definitely more competitive and wanting to succeed when I was younger in school m, but do see now that it isn’t just about what you learn from an actual class or book, but the experience on the whole, as well, too.
Exactly! I feel like this is probably really common for us growing up here to not appreciate learning because we take it for granted. I’m still a bit competitive with myself, but I now truly appreciate the process in a way I never did when I was younger.
I wonder how many kids and teenagers really understand that education is an experience. I think it’s hard to get that while you still are required to go to school. My oldest is starting to get it, I think – her trip to Europe with classmates was the turning point.
Exactly! I recently read “I Am Malala,” and you can see how much she craves school and learning, and I think it’s because it wasn’t a given for her, whereas here it’s a requirement.
I’m glad your daughter is starting to get it! I think when you have the opportunity to see in person things you’ve learned about that it starts to click more. I know I felt that when I went to Israel for the first time.
Bev, sounds like you and I have a lot in common. Nerds unite! Lifelong learning is cool. Thanks for sharing.
Yay for nerditude! (And making up words)
I’m absolutely someone who still loves a classroom setting, and I take it seriously. I did really well in elementary school and then had a few middle and high school years of totally goofing off. College was a mixed bag. To this day, I have anxiety dreams about studying. Clearly, I need to find a way to get rid of those and maybe.. take a new class!
I have anxiety dreams about studying also!
I love the silly face picture of you and Eve! You are so right about all of the learning that happens outside the classroom. That’s why it’s so important to expose our children and ourselves to lots of different people, places and things. For myself, I wish I had taken better advantage of classes and lectures and learning opportunities on campus while I was in college.
I’m totally with you on taking better advantage of lectures and learning opportunities when I was on campus. I still need to do a better job! Harvard and Tufts are both so close to me, I could easily attend a public lecture there. That reminds me, there are some at my grad school I need to check out…
I love learning. And perhaps my younger self may want to slap me for that, maybe not, she was hungry for knowledge too. I was always a good student. School was important to me, but somewhere along the way it wasn’t as important. 🙁 Thankfully, I came back to my senses.
I made sure to keep my education going even though I became a mom. Actually… being a mom made me WANT to keep going. 🙂 I was in the hospital with my laptop in hand, nursing my son and finishing work all at once. I’m glad the kids got to see me work hard for my grades.
I’m sure you have been a huge inspiration to your children in so many ways, including their education!